Wednesday, April 29, 2009
from my heart...
I've been finding it really hard to move on from the fact Andrea is gone. I'm sure I've run across a lot of people that read this and I smile and say I'm fine, but inside I'm dying. Lately my sadness has made me very impatient and grouchy. Ask my kids and family! I went to bed last night praying for the Lord to help me move on from this in a positive way. I know that I'm never gonna get over losing one of my best friends but I also know my family can't be punished for it either. This morning I tried to get back on track of the routine I was doing before she passed. I got up had my coffee and read my Bible. I read over a verse I found interesting. It was in 1Kings 3:9 I believe. It was King Solomon praying to God to show him how to lead his people. I too find myself saying that exact prayer. I want to turn this sadness into something good for the Lord. I know that's what he wants and that is what Andrea would want. I just don't know what it is I'm to do. I continued my morning with a walk with the girls and then we were outside till lunch working on the yard. When Kevin came home from lunch he brought me flowers. Daisy's of course, which are mine, Andrea's, & Kristin's favorite. My first words were "Glad I woke up and decided to be nice today!!" I'm so privileged to have someone who still tries to make me happy even though I haven't made him very happy lately. I'm going to continue to re channel this energy for the good and not evil, even if it's one day at a time. Just thought I would share, thanks for listening
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10 comments:
It may be dark but God is light to us! You are loved by Jesus and all of us in blog world.
Your hubs is keeper to notice your sadness and bring home some daisies to cheer you. Way to go!
Kevin might have to be my floral consultant for the wedding because I love those! I hate knowing you are having such a hard time, but have faith you find a way to pull through. You are a strong lil lady and such an inspiration! I'm coming on the 16th (and can't wait to see you and the kids!)but will be later as I have Shane's mom's graduation in Ft. Wayne at 11:30 that morning!
Keep that head up. It will always be hard missing her, but that doesn't mean life has to be missing her. You live for her every day. :)
I can tell you one thing....you have 3 beautiful, sweet children to brighten your days:)...and they think of you as the best mommy in the world. In fact, Gunnar wrote a sentence in class today about how he loved his mommy and how she played with him. He talks about you ALL the time!! I'm looking forward to hopefully spending next year with the 2nd Jones Kindergartner:)
Wish I had the right words to help...but just know that I'm praying that God gives you the strength to turn all this sadness (over losing someone so dear to you) into something positive. Hang in there, girlie:)!
Day by day is the only thing I can say... You know that Andrea would want you to put a big smile on your face and enjoy every minute of your beautiful life:) That's what keeps me going!!!
I am so sorry for you--
I can not imagine loosing my best friend!!! My prayers are with you!! Bless you
PS I did not know Andrea but I am sure she would want you to move on and be happy that she is in heaven!
I'm praying for you. I can't imagine what you are going through and I know the pain will never go away. Continue to seek God's plan in all of this heartache.
I'm not sure if there's anything I can say to make you feel better.....but I am praying for you! I'm praying that you feel her presence with you always!!
Tha flowers are gorgeous... I can not even begin to imagine what your going through and I hope I never have to find out which I'm sure I will one day. I continue to pray for you all...
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